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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

A Second Chance

Written by: Larry J. Pitman

“You´re a loser.” She screamed at me, “And you always will be!”

The last sounds of a broken marriage kept echoing back at me, playing over and over in my head. The really sad part was that I totally agreed with her.

How could I not agree when I reflected on what had happened over the past few years?

All our dreams and hopes, now just the dry husks of what they once were, the life strangled out of them.

I’d tried. God knows I’d tried. I’d worked until I was totally exhausted—physically, mentally and, most of all, spiritually.

The marriage, the business, my family--- all gone. Not quickly, but drip by drip... agonizingly.

So much lost…..After a while, I just began to feel numb.

Mom died.

The market crashed.

Then the marriage went sour.

Exposed along the way were all my weaknesses, my faults. My confidence, or maybe it was my arrogance, was eroded away until there was nothing left.

Sure, I can understand why she did what she did. After all, she signed on when everything looked good. So why stick around when things go bad?

“In good times and bad?” Our vows. Forget it.

Sometimes I just ask, “Why me?”

I have thought about killing myself, but I would probably botch that, too.

Still, there is a little left inside. A small spark of hope. It needs to be nurtured. I need time to lick my wounds and to heal. I have to get away. Some place different.

That´s why I am on the plane to Peru. No one knows me there. I can start again. A little money is left so l want to give it one last try.

Somewhere, deep down, I believe that I have learned something that maybe I can change and then I can have a second chance.